Can you tell us about the process?
The first step I took was setting up an appointment with a Reproductive Endocrynologist. This is not something every woman needs to do, but there happened to be one in the same building as my primary care physician so it made the most sense.
At the first appointment I had a complete woman’s wellness exam and several vials of blood taken for a complete blood workup as well as genetic carrier tests. I wanted to start immediately but decided to wait until I had my results back – just in case.
Adding:Looking back I am SO GLAD I went directly to a doctor to begin the process of trying to become a mom. I know many single women are antsy about this step. You can also look for a midwife who has experience in home or clinic inseminations if you are more comfortable going that route. Personally I knew this was going to be a big investment for me with my time, my emotions, and my finances. I wanted to go directly to a doctor.
I also want to add not all clinics or doctors will see single women. It’s infuriating when you find out a clinic has horrible policies about who they will and will not see. (I’ll be writing more about this later.)
In the meantime I had probably a very unique Mother/daughter bonding experience: My Mother and I spent a weekend looking on-line at different sperm banks my doctor’s office had experience working with. It was a whole new world for both of us.
By the second day of looking we were able to focus more. Buying sperm on-line is a very surreal thing to do. It’s like internet dating. I ended up making a list of what was important to me and then went back to the banks and used their search tools to narrow down the selection. I wanted a donor who had a similar ethnic history, indicated a good health history (it is amazing the details you are provided!), with an interest in athletics (in case it is hereditary because I am a klutz), with an outgoing personality, and a few other characteristics.
I went through several different donors from three different banks. (I will be writing more about this process later.)
I went through a total of 13 IUI’s and never achieved pregnancy.
I went through two IVF’s but only made it to retrieval day for one of them. (it’s a LONG story why I didn’t get to finish my first IVF cycle – you can find it by searching “false positive hepatitis C test” on my blog…um yeah)
My 2nd IVF resulted in a pregnancy I lost early. I then had a frozen embryo transfer and had a healthy pregnancy and beautiful son.
As for the cost breakdown? You can read all about the cost of my becoming a single mother by choice in Dollars and Sense of Family Building.
Image Credit: xytex