Tuesday was Catherine Zeta-Jones’s birthday. How old do you think she is? Go ahead, guess!
According to the internet she is now 43. When I saw that number I confess that I did chuckle. Because, seriously. REALLY? I have no fact base reason to have this reaction but every fiber-optic line in my cranium is yelling, “no fucking way.”
Earlier in the week I watched the newest episode of Sesame Street with W. Halle Berry was in a segment illustrating what the word “nibble” means. I giggled along with her and Elmo and was struck by how great she looked. Curiosity got the better of me and I decided to look up her age. How old do you think Halle is?
She is 46. My reaction to that number was, “no fucking way.”
Without getting into a Hollywood conversation, because, yes, I do know that age is more than a number when image is everything, but I was amused that I had reactions to learning these women’s ages. I realized that in my walking around, day-to-day, life I also have these reactions about age.
{To be clear: I assumed Catherine was older and Halle was younger.}
If you ask me to quickly tell you how old I am I would say I am 33. Then I would pause, do a bit of math, and say, “wait. 36!” Once I hit age 33 I just stopped paying attention. Oddly I also have this weird assumption that every other woman who I know is the same age as me. This means that I pretty much think every woman is 33.
When I find out that a friend is younger than I assumed I am blown away. But nothing compares to my jaw drop when I discover a friend is older.
Having been on the receiving end of people thinking I am younger (hurrah for adult acne!) I can tell you that I cringe a bit when someone says, “Oh! I thought you were younger.” In my head I take that to mean “you think I am immature.” This is silly as when I tell someone I thought they were younger it has everything to do with looks and not a lick to do with behavior.
I wonder how it feels to have someone think you are older.
How old are you? How old do people think you are? How do you FEEL about that?
Image of Catherine Zeta Jones is by David Shankbone. The image of Halle Berry is by Alexander Horn.
{ 53 comments… read them below or add one }
I will be forty a month from today (October 26). That’s right, forty. Most people think I’m in my young thirties. I love it. I even had someone gasp and was shocked I was over 30.
They were either being nice or lying. Or both.
I’m fine with it. Age is a state of mind, to me. I feel good, I try to look as good as I possibly can and I love life.
I thought you were 33
I would have said you were maybe in your late 20s. Maybe 30 at most. I think you have a young-looking face! I just turned 35, and I’m afraid I look older than I am. Someone I met at Type A thought I was closer to her age (46) because I understand her cultural references and we had similar experiences. She was shocked to find out I was 34 at the time. Then a new coworker had a birthday last month and everyone thought he was turning 30 when he was in fact turning 36. They were shocked to find out he was older than I am. They attributed to the fact that I’ve worked here for so long and they’ve watched me grow up as well as the fact that I seem so wise. Ugh. I can’t help but think it’s because I look like an old crone.
You totally do not look like an old crone!
People have always thought I was older than I am. I’m 28, and am routinely mistaken to be about 32-33. I’ve been 5’8″ since fourth grade, though, and that’s about the time I went from being understood to be ten-ish to being mid-teens, despite my lack of curves or grace or really any other marker than my height to make me seem older than I was.
I’ve always been told I’m an old soul, and I take it as a compliment that people find me more mature than my age (at least I hope that’s what they mean) but as I’m creeping towards my third decade I’m starting to fear that it’s because I look a bit haggard. Doesn’t help that I’m routinely plucking WHITE hairs out of my husband’s head, who is also 28.
There have been a couple of times, very recently, where I was assumed to be 24, but I was out without my family and it was with professionals who are my (very young) parents’ ages, so I kind of took that as a blanket roughly-their-kids-ages. It was much nicer to be thought younger, for once, but kind of more fun to burst that bubble.
I am 43. It seems there are a lot of people surprised by that. I have no issues with my age and will say it with pride when someone inquires.
40 used to sound old. Then you cross that line, and well, not so much. What came with 40 for me, besides the well-publicized but I did not believe it- decline in eyesight, was a much greater sense of myself, what I wanted to do, who I wanted to be, and the experience to avoid some of those people pleasing things that went on in my 20′s & 30′s. 40 and after is a great time for women, for lots of reasons, including slightly older kids, having more choices, and feeling more settled and ready to take on the world.
Can’t wait to be 40!
When I was in my early twenties, people thought I was older. like late twenties. Not sure when it switched over, but now people are mostly astonished at my age. I’m forty-freaking-nine! I will (GASP) be 50 next June. Want to come to the big birthday bash? I’ve decided that the them will be 50 Before Pre-K, as my 50th birthday is about two months before Sunshine will start pre-kindergarten.
And, yeah, Catherine Z-J, 43? Sure.
Although, I’m not terribly surprised about Halle. In general, darker skin ages more slowly.
I’m 46 and people always think I’m at least 10-12 years younger. I think having a 4-year-old throws them off. I also have an 8 year old..I think people look older and I have to hide my surprise when I hear they’re younger!…
so distracted by the lopsided boobs in that photo…
anyway, I was told women should lie about their age – by saying they are older than they are; that way everyone thinks you look wonderful!
I’m 36, and unless I’m around the yoof (10 years younger) at work whose cultural references and music I’m starting to really not get, I feel about 27. People often think I’m slightly younger (maybe something to do with my pasty white skin as I burn so easily?) but I’ve always said I was ‘born middle aged’ as I’ve had quite a wise head on my shoulders and wasn’t into clubbing etc when younger.
I do believe in growing older gracefully so try not to think about numbers, and as I’ve lost over 50lbs in the last 18 months I feel much younger, but I’m still covering my grey hairs!
ooooooooh my goodness! Totally missed the lopsided. Wow!
Yeah, I noticed the boobs too. Funny.
I quit paying attention years ago too. I’m to the point I actually have to do the math in order to give the answer.
Twice in the last week, I was told that I didn’t look old enough to have a son turning 18 in December. I was a few months shy of 21 when he was born too.
Age is just a number. It really is how you feel. My mind is sharp…maybe that’s why it doesn’t bug me like some people.
I’m 32…or 33…I forget. =)
I’m 43, but have always looked younger (hurray for being short?). My gray hair is making up for lost time, though – if I dyed it, I’d probably be right back to looking young again. I don’t worry about it regardless…
You look like you’re 33 or younger…
interesting that you equate your height with how people perceive your age…I never thought about that.
I’m 36, but people always assume I am younger. I think it is partly the way I act (always ready for some silliness), but mostly my appearance. With an African American mom that could be anywhere from 50 to 60 looks wise (she is actually 64), I have a bit of that unwrinkled, glowy complexion thing going on like Halle (that is where the comparisons end, of course).
My favorite response was from a fellow teacher that assumed I was in my mid-twenties- impossible if he had done the math on my 7 years of teaching.
I’m 46, but I hear you on getting stuck on various ages. From age 21-28 I always defaulted to thinking I was 25. Then from 32-37 I kept thinking I was 32. For the past 4 years I’ve default-thought of myself as 42. I have an acquaintance who described herself once as ‘no longer pulling 30, but pushing 40′. I hate that that stuck with me, because now every time I tick over from -5 to -6 I think of it. No longer pulling 40 but pushing 50. Yikes.
I thought you were older, in your 40s, probably about 44. This has nothing to do with your looks – as Catherine and Halle show, people in their 40s don’t look 40s anymore. Or rather 40s looks younger today than it ever has. My assumption was purely based on you being a single woman with a 3yo child conceived through IVF. Now that I know you made that decision at the age of about 32, I am even more in awe of you and your maturity.
ha! Interesting.
(side note: I actually started trying to be a Mom when I was 29)
I’m 43 (44 next week!). People generally seem to think I’m in my mid-30′s. I’m not wrinkly really (I think about as wrinkly as CZJ, so to me she looks right, even though you thought she was older). The relative unwrinkliness may be something to do with my obsession with skin care products. But so far I’ve refused to dye my hair, so now people tut at me that I’m too young to go grey and that I should cover up the grey wisps. Meh. I’m sure once there are more obvious greys, my perceived age will shoot up, so maybe once people start thinking I’m older than I am, I might care more about dyeing it.
I’m 31 now, though I had to think about that. Matt asked me how old he was the other day. People usually guess younger on me, but less since I started hauling around a baby/toddler/child.
And I also assume everyone is the same age as I am. Because they have to be, right?
I’m 52, today. But I routinely get mistaken for someone 10 years younger. I remember when I turned 40 I had colleagues who didn’t believe me and I had to show them my drivers license to prove it. I think it’s genetics, because my Mom looks amazing for her age.
I know that I can never tell how old anyone else, so just assume they’re in their 40s.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
I’m 35 and only started to really realize it when I heard that this year was the 20th anniversary of Pearl Jam and Counting Crows first albums. I had to do a double take to realize I was that far removed from high school and audio cassettes.
I am now 41. For years, people thought I was older than my age: I matured early (physically) and looked 16/17 when I was 13 and was also mature for my age in terms of responsibility, vocabulary and the like.
Things shifted when I went to grad school at 30 to pursue a second career. The majority of my classmates were 22-25, and they thought I was the same age. And I am now a first-time mom of twins since January of this year, so people often guess I am younger on that basis as well.
Without vanity, I will say that, on a good day, when I’m well-hydrated and rested and wearing makeup, I could pass for 35. On a typical day, I think I look about my age.
I will be 46 at New Year. I get told all the time I look younger. In the dark in the bar I get told 30. In the light 35. I feel great and I love when dudes in their 20′s try to pick me up at work. Every woman in her mid 40′s should have that kind of attention it is FUN. You my love are a baby LOL
Oh yeah and Elliott is 48 today. He looks young for sure.
Good grief – you guys BOTH look like you are in your 30′s! And Happy Birthday to Elliott!
I am 51. Some days I certainly FEEL every day of it, but most of the time I can’t believe I am actually this old. :p I am told I don’t look it. I hope so, although I don’t think I look quite as young as I used to. I think a lot of the people who used to reassure me that having a baby would happen thought I was a lot younger than I really was.
I’m 40, and most people say they can’t believe it becuase I look younger. Granted I’m not sure I look as young as I would like them to think, but to be honest, I don’t know what 40 is supposed to look like.
It’s strange. When I was in my teens, people always thought I was older. In my late twenties, people assumed I was still in college. And now, at 34, it begins to level out a bit. But my little sister, I still think of her as little. We’re only three years apart and yet.
Not even kidding, I totally thought you were in your mid 20′s.
I turned 36 in August and threw myself an amazing party. I still get carded in bars! And I have to admit that the snarky comes out when I meet someone I think is older than I, based on looks, and they turn out to be vastly younger than me. My mother looks gorgeous at 57 and I’m hoping to ride those good gene coattails as long as I can. I don’t mind getting older, in fact, most days I’m impressed I’ve made it this far! And you are gorgeous Dresden!
Ps- I was taken aback by the lopsided boobs as well. Must be a wierd angle.
“Lopsided Boobs” is going to be the name of my next book.
awesome idea Dresden, after all we’ve all got ‘em, just usually hide them better with our ‘over shoulder boulder holders’!
Calendarically, I am 48 and 3/4ths. Or so. I have the sense of humour of a 12-year-old boy. And I think I look like I’m in my late 30′s, early 40′s. I could be wrong about that, though.
yay! someone else who shares my sense of humour! everything is innuendo, and bodily functions are -always- funny
I have the EXACT same reaction when Catherine Zeta-Jones’ birthday was announced on NPR this morning. I was like… only 43??? But then I thought, well, her husband is much older, so maybe that’s why I thought she was older.
I am 34. People generally think I’m much younger. I work with a bunch of 20-somethings and it can be off-putting when they find out my age and gasp as if 34 is so old. My husband is 39 and got carded the last time we were having a drink and I didn’t. That was lame. He looks like he’s 25. But I can’t complain about any of this, I’ll take it!
Oh and my husband’s hair is almost completely gray but he’s been coloring it since he was about 25. Our friends are always surprised when they find out about this! (They’ll say something like, he’s so lucky he has no gray hairs, hehe.) I keep wanting him to go salt and pepper and become the silver fox!
Im 37 but most guys think im in my mid to upper 20s while women think im in my early 30s LOL
Totally on point. Because? You posted this on MY BIRTHDAY!!! (don’t ask which one)
I thought I was the only one who stopped at 33!
I would have guess older for CZJ too! I’ll be 43 in a month. I still find it hard to grasp that I’m in my 40s! Most people tell me they think I look a lot younger, including doctors.
Maybe it’s stupid, but it makes me very happy to hear that.
I am 37 but most people think I am in my 20′s. I have a 17 year old daughter and we have people tell us all the time that we look like sisters. My daughter actually loves that and loves to show pictures of the two of us. I am guessing time will catch up with me though!
I am 35. I guess either I hang with people who know my age already or it doesn’t come up. I don’t know reactions to my age. MH on the other hand shocks people, including me, because he has a baby face.
I hate age conversations. People always assume I am younger (adult acne ftw, too!) and it pokes at the places I don’t like to go to with regards to being “old enough” to be a parent and such. When people find out I’m 31, they’re usually shocked.
I feel like I’m still 16 most days. Seriously, I feel like I’m getting away with something when I don’t get carded. But my 27th birthday is actually in a month. And I look older than that thanks to my ever-widening gray stripe. I started going gray at 19 and nobody has guessed my age on the young side since then. I guess adult acne can’t fool them all the time.
And you look Mahvelous dahling, simply mahvelous! Me? I’m 52. I know I don’t look it, but some days, like today, my body knows how old it is. I am the same age as one of my babysitters in her early 20′s, also the same age as the GRANDMOTHERS of some of my kid’s classmates. Oh, well. My mother until recently looked nothing like her 90 years. Good genes I guess. Also? Immaturity! (What my husband and I joke is the secret to our “youthful good looks.”)
I am your age, within two months. I look younger — some combination of genes and staying out of the sun.
I would have assumed that you are 36 because it is so obvious that you are exactly my age based on the cultural references!
Catherine Zeta Jones would look stunning letting her hair go gray at 43.
Halle Berry would look stunning with gray hair and the au naturale look while pregnant. The mature, sexy, secure look . . .