(SCROLL DOWN FOR THE QUESTION)
Like I said, the holidays can be hard for us in many different ways. I am really only just now starting to feel some major sadness over GM not being here for my birthday and Christmas. Since before I was born my Grandmother would host these sometimes outrageously huge holiday meals on Christmas Eve. She would invite friends and family and strangers and everyone would feel loved and special and most of all stuffed with yummy food.
And then I had the audacity to be born on Christmas Eve.
You would think that holiday plans would shift so that I could have a special day, but I came to accept that my birthday, in the eyes of my Grandmother, only lasted a few hours. I was allowed to be doted and celebrated upon from the time I woke up to an early lunch hour. This was sometimes extended if GM could get someone to take me out of the house for lunch so that she could move forward with her massive list of things to do before the highlight of the day: dinner.
And of course I used this tiny window of a birthday to strictly enforce such rules as NO holiday paper on birthday gifts and no mentioning (within my earshot) of Christmas until after lunch. When I got older I started coming up with other stupid rules like no connected gifts. Meaning don’t give me a Wilson Phillips cd on my birthday and then wink and say I might have something cool to play it on the next day.
The last several birthdays have been shitty for me thanks to Alzheimer’s. But this year it is really hitting me how lost I am in how to celebrate. This is probably why when Marta extended an invitation to our family to join her family for Christmas Eve dinner I nearly gave myself whiplash by accepting so fast. Having a dinner to look forward to will be therapeutic on many levels. And part of me thinks that GM will get a kick out of me, once again, ceding the day. But somehow that just seems right. I don’t know any other way.
In the next couple of days I am going to be attempting some distracting blog posts to help anyone that needs it. Think of it as a daily meme with only one question. And if the question yields to a blog post of your very own then rock on. If you have a question you want posed to the internets feel free to e-mail me and I will try to keep the blah la la la la going.
FIRST QUESTION:
Do you like your hair? Do other people like your hair? Discuss…
Man, I hate the linked gift. My birthday is much farther from Christmas than yours, and I still got the ol’ “since it’s Christmas AND your birthday, I got you TWO socks!!!”
Trust that your birthday will not be forgotten. This, I promise. ♥
But even without such complications, years after changes so large as what you’ve been through this year – even one, without the other – are so, so hard. 6 years on, and we still have trouble figuring out what to do with the holidays…
Please do tell me what to do, then, for my honey who was actually born on Christmas. She hates being in the limelight. She is not big on surprises. And she’s turning 40. Anyone? Anyone? Maybe this can be your question for tomorrow. Though I guess your blog shouldn’t be all about my girlfriend. But what to do? She reads my blog.
I’ll answer the hair question on my own blog. Thanks for the fodder. XOXO
Something that I dug when I was younger was celebrating my 1/2 birthday. Getting half a cake. yum! Maybe for your girlfriend you could create a room in your house that is the birthday room. Sort of like birthday mistletoe. If she is in that room then everyone has to go all apeshit birthday bananas on her. But once out of the room it is Christmas again.
Most days I like my hair except for rainy days. I spend the whole day worrying about it frizzing,so tuck it under a hat or scarf:) I’m not sure other people like it although it bothers ne when they stick their hands in it.Unless they are clean.
Umm yes my hair is one of the three things i like (cleavage and eyes are the other two) about myself. Its black brown and Indian straight. I don’t blow dry it so its very healthy. A friend who is a colorist has been comping me highlights in exchange for me not cutting it which I’m happy to do
Yes. I like my hair! I think it’s purdy.
My hair- I’ve had it long most of my life until just recently. About a year ago I chopped it off and oh. my. god. It’s like a whole different thing up there.
Before: Would do what it was told to do… and as long as I told it something it was okay. Curls required product. Doing nothing resulted in frizz ball. Frizzy on top, ram-rod straight below. Not a pretty sight.
After: Listens so much better! Straightener makes it look all silky and wonderful. Curls organize themselves into cute sexy ringlets.
I think I shall have shortish hair from now on. Vast improvement.
I only like my hair if someone else has blown it dry and flat ironed it. (But this rarely happens as such a process could easily take half a day)
Hair? UGH. BANE of my existence. Straight, sort of. Unless I want it to be. ZERO body. Fine, but lots of it. NEVER does the same thing twice. Had it super super long until I was 16, then, the longest it’s been is just past my shoulders, and it seems to just STOP growing after that. I have toyed, on more than one occasion, with the idea of extensions. If they were only cheaper.
My hair and I have a pact. As long as it doesn’t annoy me, I won’t f*** with it. So, I get a haircut every once in a while (going on 18 months now, looks like my hair doesn’t grow very fast any more), and spend the rest of the time throwing it into a ponytail. Then I had a baby and it developed this obnoxious wave that you can’t do anything with. It may be a result of being trapped in a ponytail for so many years (like, 15, off and on). When my hair does f*** with me, I will annoy it back with some color or hair products or the blow dryer.
Having a birthday around any holiday is very annoying – mine is right around Independence Day. Yeah, sure, all those fireworks are for me. However, Christmas would be my least favorite choice, followed by Christmas Eve (Happy Birthday!), and then New Year’s Eve.
As a fellow Christmas Eve baby, that Wilson Phillips CD thing make me lol. Because oh man, have I ever been there!
I hope we both have an awesome birthday this year! Oh…and yeah, my hair is actually pretty cool. I feel lucky about my hair.
I used to love my hair. For the last 20 years it has been ultra short, funky and vibrant red. It required hair cuts every 4-6 weeks to keep it looking fabulous and, working in the centre of the city, I had access to some of the best salons around.
However, now that I work from home and rarely leave the house I haven’t bothered to cut it….since February 10th. It is now curly, almost shoulder length and in desperate need of a dye job. I’m adamant that I’m not growing it – I’m just not cutting it…today. One day I’ll probably get sick of it and chop it all off…until then I’ll just let it keep growing and see what happens.
my dad’s bday is Christmas Eve, and last year my grandfather (his father) passed on Christmas Eve as well. He’s always insisted on a super-duper birthday celebration (more than I do!) but this year there’s just too many anniversaries for one day to handle. Not looking forward to it.
My hair is naturally curly. Yes, everyone SAYS they want naturally curly hair, that is until it rains and it all turns to a big ol’ frizzy white girl ‘fro. I finally found a website (naturallycurly dot com) that lists all of the people who specialize in cutting curly hair and has reviews from clients. I found my beloved Patrick that way, who cuts my hair dry and “feels” where to cut it (almost with his eyes closed) like my head is a freakin topiary. He’s brilliant, an artist. He doesn’t always nail it, but it’s always better than anyone else and when he’s “on” I actually love my hair for quite some time. He also started me on curly hair shampoo that has less “soap” in it (lo poo) and is less drying. Anyway, I recommend the site for finding a stylist for any fellow curly heads here. No, I’m not affiliated and it’s free.
*removes megaphone*
funny- someone JUST told me about this website this weekend. I so need to check it out.
Omg, TOTALLY checking this site out!
My hair is fine. I should get it cut more often I guess. I don’t think anybody notices my hair.
I’m not a huge fan of my hair. It’s naturally curly, but not tight, cute curls. It’s somewhere between loose waves and curling iron curls. It’s currently just past my shoulders when it’s dry, which is awfully long for me. I usually keep it chin-length because it’s so heavy, and it get really flat on top when it gets long. It’s a medium brown color, and has some decent natural highlights. Other people seem to like my hair a lot more than I do.
My hair is good. The gray grows in too fast so I spend too much time in the salon, but I deal. I recently got a good cut and I am happy with it.
I have many physical characteristics that drive me crazy, but I really do love my hair. It’s long, and mostly straight but a little wavy, and brown with some blond and auburn in it. I used to color it and do a lot of different wacky styles but right before my grandmother died several years back, she said, “Why do you color your hair? It’s such a beautiful color naturally.” So I stopped. I don’t do much with it, I usually just let it air dry or I direct the vents in my car onto it so that it will dry faster. Every now and then I get bored and ask my hair stylist to cut it all off, and she flat out refuses. That’s about it!
I always feel bad about you poor near-Christmas birthday people. Christmas, my mom’s birthday and my parents’ wedding anniversary all occur within a week’s span of time. I try to make the birthday gift special by making sure to get together AFTER the holidays. Maybe you can have a get-together well BEFORE?!
And I love my hair. it is crazy curly and today it’s frizzy, but I do love it.
I do wish you could have full day birthdays, but at least the rise until lunch part is the best time of the day and hopefully includes candle-lit pancakes occasionally.
I like my hair. It’s getting a bit blah and I’m thinking of trying for an edgier cut, but this is such a hard thing with curly hair. You know this. Anyone with curly hair knows this. That’s why we love our blow-outs! The two things that saved my hair in the last few years is that I stopped bleaching or trying to go lighter in any way and I only wash twice a week. I know that must sound gross, but my hair is awfully dry and I live in the desert without a lick of humidity. Works for me.
And I love your hair. Very very much.
I loves my hair, it’s my best feature. Aaaaannd…I’m on week 3 of going no-poo (no shampoo). It’s been interesting, thus far. My scalp is still freaking out but I’m loving the apple cider vinegar rinse, makes the hair so smoooooooooooth and lovely.
However. My scalp is ridonkulously dry (hello, winter in New England, hello, wood stove) and I don’t have any coconut oil at the moment with which to pre-condition it. Hopefully it’ll arrive next week and I can do my thang.
Even with the problems I’m very excited about no-poo, and I’m losing a lot less hair when I comb it in the shower, so, yay.
My hair, hummm. Well it’s usally relaxed, but now I’m wearing it curly (I have no time to style it). It’s too thick, it’s now grey ( a pox on aging), and my feeling about it depends upon the day. I have abused it and it’s fallen out just to remind me who’s in charge. Let’s say we have a love hate relationship.
I like my hair sometimes and sometimes I hate it. I washed it yesterday with one hand (baby in the other) and then didn’t set it properly, so right now I hate it. It’s a fuzzy mess. When I straighten it properly, I will like it again.
Fuck yes, I love my hair.
We may very well be asking you for advice on this very birthday dilemma… Not the same day perhaps, but a similar problem.
I like my hair fine now that I know how to manage it. I don’t like that it’s so fine that it’s hard to style and keep in a hair tie etc. But I do like that it’s so fine that it’s soft and waves.
p.s. I don’t know what other people think of my hair really. I think they think I don’t style it enough. haha.
I love my hair now but I didn’t like it when I was younger. When I was little, I had no clue how to handle it…but, now it is FABULOUS!
My two very best friends have birthdays just before and just after Christmas so I have had many years of hearling the bday-near-Christmas gripe. But now they are both in their late 40s and they love their bdays because everyone is together and people “come home.” They have rockin’ bday parties now as people are familyed-out and are eager to get out and celebrate.
My hair, oy. I love it sometimes, but mostly it is an over-grown, uncooperative, frizz bomb. But I am glad that I don’t have to worry about balding like so many men do.
I guess I don’t love my hair but there are days I like it. I’m blaming my mother for telling my whole childhood long how finde and good for nothing my hair was. I felt better when a hairdresse once said to me that my hair might have changed and wasn’t so fine after all. Thanks Nicole
My hair and I have a love/hate relationship. I’m not a big fan that it really does have to be washed and styled every single day. But hair and I really get along, I like to get a completely different look each time I go to the salon. I used to feel the need to go to a very EXPENSIVE salon and spend insane amounts of money on a new look…BUT now, I have this lady who I LOVE and she does a great job at less then half the price of my old place. So I love hair because you can do so much to it and it will either grow back or each night you can erase that look and start all over.
Here’s the deal with my hair. It’s red. And wavy. I don’t know if the wavy-ness comes from my Viking ancestry, but I do know that’s where the red came from (Irish Vikings, WOO). So, the colour is something I’ve always loved, and have always been complemented on. Others have mentioned the texture (my hair is pretty thick, but soft) especially when it forms loose ringlets at the bottom. Me? I’ve always hated the texture of my hair. Now that I flat iron it, I can safely say I have a hardcore love for my hair, all over.
I’m glad that it sounds like you have a lovely plan for your birthday/christmas eve.
Most days I like my hair. It just gets annoying when it’s humid out because it gets frizzy easily. And I can never not use product. But the color is unique and lots of people give me compliments on that and the curl.
My hair is crazy curly. It’s just so weird. And it’s thin, I think it probably looks thicker than it is. And post-partum hair? Sucks. It all fell out around my temples and now it’s growing back and I look like I’m a 7 year old who wielded some scissors in the general direction of my hair and it looks rediculous. All worth it of course, but rediculous. Yes, other people are constantly telling me they wish they had my hair. It’s fine. It’s easy. I like it now. It was the death of me in Jr High and early high school, until I figured out how to control it (mousse).
Happy almost-birthday.
My mom’s is tomorrow (the 18th) and my step-dad’s is the 26th, so we’re all about the December birthdays around here too. I try not to cross Christmas and birthdays but I think they’re past the age of caring, so that helps. 
A Christmas eve dinner sounds lovely, but we’ll be sure to note your birthday. I have the perfect solution though…. Just stop celebrating Christmas and celebrate a different winter holiday. Ok, I was kidding with that part.
I don’t LOVE my hair, but I do like it. The color is unremarkable, but it suits me. It has great body and will comply with any styling I choose to impart upon it. Which is useful for the stage. In the day to day, I don’t do much with it and it still presentable. 5 seconds with the flat iron for the bangs and air dry the rest. If I’m feeling fancy it may get some smoother or frizz tamer.
However, I’m very glad that my hair is different now then wehn I was a child. It was very mousy, thin, and stick straight then and I spent a few awkward years wearing it permed and short. Very “little orphan annie” only brown. In combination with my terrible skin, braces, and neck brace it was a sight!
I have to admit I am rather vain about my hair; it’s probably my best feature. It’s very thick — I have yet to have a hairdresser lay their hands on it who hasn’t commented on how thick it is. I’ve worn it relatively short for the past 25 years & that helps, because it’s just too darn hot to wear long. I’m starting to see a LITTLE too much grey in it these days, though — I finally caved & had it coloured (my hairdresser sat & glared at me until I agreed to let her do it…!) & I must admit it does look good… but I know the grey is there, lurking…!
having had a gf several yrs ago whose b-day was on dec-19, i hear your birthday rules loud and clear and with a grin across my face… in 2003, she threw herself a 50th b-day party and (sadly) i think it was the first every Only-For-Her Birthday party, cuz everything else was always linked. she also hated the ~linked~ presents, but more than that? the “this counts for BOTH b-day and xmas” ones. she would rather have two separate, thrify pressies than one that was also for the holiday. we had a huge party for her, and she required NO CHRISTMAS MUSIC. only her faves (motown) and despite the holiday tree in the corner of the hall we rented, there were NO holiday decorations
MY HAIR: i like my hair when i keep the colour up (the grays are annoying me, but its my own lazyness) and i like the consistency of my hair (its thick) but i also do not like how fast it grows. i like it long enough to ponytail (you know…nurses either have long hair that can be flipped up in a clip or ponytailed or short hair) but i also really miss my short & butchy buzzed-in-the-back cut (which is too spendy to keep up)
i like these distraction posts!!!
oh. and other people always love my hair.
Actually? I’m kind of jealous of your hair, Cali. Every picture I’ve seen of you (that didn’t involve your sunglasses, anyway!), you just look so polished and perfect. I’ve tried to get mine to stay like that, but no dice.
My hair is… weird. So this is going to be a long answer! I’ve never really known what to think of it. My husband is jealous of it because his hair is so curly he had to grow it long and braid it just to keep it from knotting up. My mom is jealous of it because it’s thick enough to cover “the family bald spot” (eek!).
It’s brown, but I’d kill for it to be red. It’s too dark a brown for me to be able to dye it the shade of red I’ve always wanted without bleaching it first though, and I’m just not enough into hair maintenance to bother with that.
It’s… actually, I don’t know how to describe the texture. If I brush it while it’s wet, it dries straight. If I don’t, it dries somewhere between waves and curls, depending on what shampoo I used. I wish it would make up its mind, since it won’t hold a style either way! Products for straight hair don’t control the waves enough to keep them from popping out all over the place and products for curly hair weigh it down too much, so I can’t really use anything on it.
I haven’t had it so much as trimmed since February, so it’s halfway down my back right now. Also, I have two small gray streaks at either side of my hairline in front that I can hide if I wear my hair back or tuck it in just right, so it’s usually in a ponytail with flyaways everywhere.
I have polycystic ovary syndrome…one of the side effects (other than infertility issues) as I get older it is having the effect of causing me to lose hair on my scalp. I am losing my once thick hair. I used to love my hair and it was one of the few things I liked about myself. It is is thinning on the scalp and on a bad day seeing it so thin on top makes me want to cry. I still like the texture of my straight hair and the color is good except some grays coming in. But the thinning…oh I would really like for that to stop. When I notice my women friends over 40 are starting to get thinner hair too near the front of the scalp… I’m secretly glad I’m not the only one.
Oh love and hate it
I have black thick hair. Regarding the colour – love it, but as I don’t dye it, I do have some white hairs, and while I don’t mind it (why do I need to disguise my age??) I always get the – you should colour it, at the hairdresser’s. As for the thickness.. well I do like it and it’s good and all, but if I don’t wash it too often (mainly on dry days), it feels like I have needles up there (especially when moving hair from side to side – ouch!).
[funny, looking at girls on the street, it seems like they all have not only long hair, but very long hair. I wonder if I were in a short hair mode, if all I would see were people with short hair..]
Right now I am trying to grow it long. Think I’m almost there
And I love love love when my hair is wet! [which is another reason to love rain. I therefore also never dry it..]
My hair is very thick. So thick I’m constantly snapping hair ties when I try to put it up. I LOVED my hair in high school. It was dark, shiny, long, straight, and thick. It looked like a Pantene commercial. When I turned 25 (most likely more thyroid related that age dependent) I chopped 14 inches off of my hair and suddenly it was very wavy, frizzy and dry. All I do is wear it in a ponytail. Sometimes it’s so frizzy that the ponytail is wider than my head. I’d love to chop it off again but R likes it so I keep it. I’m never happy with it anymore. When it’s long I want to chop it all off because all I do is put it in a ponytail. When it’s short I want it long enough to have a ponytail. I can’t be pleased.
I was born with bright red hair. The kind that looks more orange in the summer and more red in the winter. The kind that people spend hundreds of dollars to try and achieve. I never hated it, in fact I love it and embrace it, however I wish I could find the perfect cut. Too long I look like a crazy hippy or my mother, too short I have that weird bob thing.
I do like my hair (while it is still in the post-haircut good zone). It took me quite awhile to accept the realities of its “now”, but think I’m pretty much there. I still prefer the years I had long auburn hair. That’s “who” I relate to and have good memories with the most.
I like my hair and I don’t care if other people like my hair because they are not the ones living under it.
Hee hee,
GG
PS, I updated my URL.
Thank you.