Rather than cloud the blog-waves with a mish mosh list of larger than life New Year’s Resolutions I will simply say that I have very concrete needs for this new year. Not wants, not “it would be so nice” ifs, but honest to goodness NEEDS.
1) I need to get help with GM and it needs to happen soon
2) I need to get better about asking for and receiving help with EVERYTHING
3) I need to have a healthy, alive, take him home, baby
4) I need to have real and concrete (as in real life) contact with people that I care about
5) I need to honor my need to be creative
6) I need to be more aware of my mental health and take care of it
See? Simple. Basic. Fuck the “loose weight”, “read more books”, “eat more organic” resolutions of my past. Those are whims. These are needs. As in if any of these needs aren’t met I will be a damaged gal.
First up, creative need. I have quietly referenced project 365 for a while and it has officially begun. What is project 365? Well it is a creative self challenge to photograph myself daily for 365 days. My goal is to explore photography while at the same time accepting the external version of me. I also think it will be an interesting side journal to the blog. I am making this project public because it will keep me honest. (I began on 12/24 and you can scroll through the previous photos by clicking “previous” under each photo.)
If you are feeling like a challenge then I invite you to join me in your own version of 365. And let me know so I can validate your beautifulness and clever camera work!
What do you need from 2009?
{ 31 comments… read them below or add one }
I haven’t quite figured out yet what I need from 2009. Yours sound like very good needs though. I hope you get all your needs fulfilled.
Our kids were miracles. Short story is we found that my husband had a brain tumor and was unable to have kids (he was 47). After we had the tumor removed I was pregnant in 3 months. My husband was so thrilled to have a son, we took a picture of him (usuallly many, many more) every day. We continued this when my daughter was born 16 months later. We continued until my daughter was 2. It was awesome and now I have chronicled both of them growing up! Think about it with snork! I cherish those pictures.
Congrats on entering the New Year full of snork, and many prayers are being sent your way for GM.
your 365s are fabbb! love them. i was actually thinking of photographing BB daily but don’t know if that’s a totally unachievable idea. what do you think?!
and happy belated birthday!!!! xxxx
A plan for moving, not just talk.
The pictures so far are great!
I need more quality sleep. Honestly, it’s a pipe dream, but it’s true. I also need a nanny. Happy New Year, Cali!
It really helps so see one’s needs written down, doesn’t it?
Yes, having a healthy baby is very, very important. There’s no reason to think that Snork won’t come through like a champ.
So many women get fixated on having a “perfect” birth (no drugs! no Caesarian section! midwives only!) that they feel like failures if all doesn’t go according to plan. I have a friend who still grieves, actually GRIEVES that her first baby had to be born by C-section. She felt she had missed a wonderful life experience by not having a “natural” birth. I pointed out that when she goes to the dentist, she doesn’t forgo the Novacaine in order to fully experience having a cavity filled, but she failed to see my point.
And the point is: Snork’s birth is just the beginning. You’re got years and years of challenges and joy ahead of you; don’t let yourself get played out doing more than you can manage for GM. You’ve already gone far beyond what ninety-nine percent of people would do in your position.
Happy 2009!
Wow! What an awesome idea. Thanks for sharing your 365 with us. I’ll have to ponder whether I’d ever be that brave.
i just checked out your 365 this morning. (psst…you are beautiful) and i am considering it… (still not sure tho)… i love your list and i am sure you will get them all… and maybe even a box or two of fudge cookies added in as bonus
love you my friend,
gypsy
I love project 365. Considering it….But admiring you while I do. Happy 2009, Cali. I am wishing and hoping all needs are met.
xo
Here is my advice for need #4. Find a mom’s group now, seek out what is important to you, be it parenting style, or SMC’s or whatever.
I found a group when I was pregnant with Bliss. They were child-centered and mostly AP which was what I was seeking but then I went, pregnant and before I had him I went to like two meet ups. From just those two, when I had Bliss I had food dropped off 3-4 times a week for the first 3 weeks and more importantly I had great moms give sage help to my terrified “I have a brand new baby and what do I do with this” kind of questions during those first weeks.
I was with that group for many years and Bliss had many wonderful play groups with that group.
It helped me connect with real live people when otherwise I may not have.
My 2 bits.
Happy New Year!!!
Love the 365 idea!!
I hope all your needs are met this year.
I NEED to stop injesting crap and eat better…I NEED some way of making an income.
Cali, I love your 365 project. Thank you for sharing it with us! And thank you again for sharing your life with us through your blog.
Great list! Love the photos. Hope Snork gets your beautiful eyes!
ITA with Salome re the birth. Healthy, live, take home baby, goal 1!
My list? Simple. (Yeah, right!)
1. Get pregnant.
2. Have one of those healthy take home babies.
3. Convince my employer that I can do my job from home with a baby on my boob.
I adore that fondue picture and I just finished Scarpetta myself. (Thanks for sharing 365).
I love the pictures you’ve taken of yourself so far. Each one seems to depict a different mood and a different day.
What do I need for 2009? A loaded question, but one I’m going to think about.
I LOVE the photos! And your needs are very necessary, yet very realistic, and I like that. I have no idea what my needs and/or wants are, but I’m thinking…
I love 365. I am scared, but I am in. I started today.
May all your needs be fulfilled in 2009. I mean that from the bottom of my heart.
you are gorgeous… i love your photo project. it inspires me! hey if you need registry ideas, feel free to check mine out. i’m at buybuybaby and there are a few things on BRU as well… xo
Those are great pictures. I like your idea and I’m considering doing something similar but maybe with me and P together every day. I have so few pictures of me with him because I am always the one to take the pictures. This is because I never think I look good enough for pictures. Maybe my need for 2009 is to get over it already.
As far as the baby stuff there were so many things I bought before I had P that were useless to me. I didn’t need pacifiers because I couldn’t get him to take one. I didn’t need a bassinet or crib because he screamed like he was on fire if I put him in one of them. I had a 1000 pairs of those little mitten things to keep him from scratching his face. Loved those and those little gowns for easy diaper changes the most of all. I could have done without the wipe warmer because it just dried them out anyway. I’ll quit babbling now.
I love the photo of you and your Mom!!! So cute! (the fondue one) You know how you can resolve some of the “in person” stuff! hehehe
I need… oh what… simplicity. I’m so tired of the complex life I’ve led since the very end of 2007 … I want a little dose of ordinary!
I just flipped through your 365… a bit guiltily since I don’t think I have the courage to do it. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a picture of you… your face, that is. You’re so gorgeous!
brilliant and true-hearted. this is why i love reading your blog.
i also, naturally as a photographer, love love love your idea of 365 days a year self-portrait. so i’m starting my own to see how it is to be on the other side of the camera.
i also made my own “need” list last night.
one of the items surprisingly (yet, not), was “adopt a child.”
it came from my fingers into the keys so quickly and easily, i just smiled.
indeed, 2009 has a lot of goodness in store after a year like 2008.
Ok I am gonna try 365ing it with ya! The first pic isn’t great… but hmm – that’s how my night has been.
What I need in 2009
peace of mind – or peace in my mind or something
to start the fertility journey rolling
to ask for help more often
to work less and spend more time with my lovies.
This is a good idea. Needs, not wants or pipedreams or unrealistic expectations bound for failure.
Must think about needs.
I’m doing the 365, but may keep it private on flickr. I’m not sure yet.
((hugs))
I made myself a list for the year. It’s the first time I’ve ever written that crap down instead of just keeping a list in my head. On it? Decide if I want to do 365. I just took and uploaded my first pic. Scary!
I love the 365 project! My friend Andy took a polaroid of himself every day of 1997 (http://365plrds.com/) and stuck them up on his wall. It was awesome to watch his visual record of 1997 spread across his living room. I loved looking at the entire collection and counting how many times he wore his Broncos sweatshirt, when his hair was the longest, how often he smiled in pictures (approx. once per month). I know you’ve got a lot on your hands these days, but you might find it fun to have these pictures in hard copy instead of just digital. You will be able to pick out patterns that you wouldn’t otherwise notice!
Your mother’s glasses are so fun! I look forward to seeing how your pictures progress as the Snork comes…
I fell into a commenting void with the busy-ness of the holidays (and spending lots of time with Chance and Apollo). I apologize for not being around as much lately, but I’m getting back into the swing of things.
Great list, Cali. And as for the help – just call me. Seriously. I mean it. I’m too close not to be able to be there.
What do I need? *sigh* I need for this to work THE FIRST TIME with no unnecessary cycling/pregnancy drama. Of course that’s not up to me, but it’s what I (we) need. I need to learn that I can’t do everything and accept that.
I’ve been checking out 365 since last week and I think it’s a wonderful idea. If pictures can tell a thousand words, imagine the statement that a year’s worth of pictures will make. One of the things I vowed to do (years ago and never really accomplished until after this last year of blogging) was to document parts of my life better. Writing in my blog consistently for almost a year is a huge accomplishment for me. After I saw yours I thought of maybe doing the same but I didn’t want to be a flaky copycat, so thanks for the open invitation to try it for ourselves. I think I’ll start on my birthday, which is coming up in February.
I love, love, love the project. Your photos rock. I love what you did with the very first one. I can’t wait to see how this project unfolds. You’ve really got me thinking about a project of my own. . .