What really sucks is that I am so good at preparing for the worst. SO good. I am like a four star general of waiting for the shoe to drop. And even now, as I try to sit firmly in a happy place, I am feeling the fog lift up around me. It is trying to take me in.
On the way back from the blood lab (& hell yes I was covert fax number add-on girl again) a scene from one of my all time favorite movies popped into my head. It is actually one of the most scary scenes of the movie and to this day it gives me the creeps. And yet, there it was, playing on repeat in my mind, preparing me for the worst…
I hate that I am so good at the dread.
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UPDATE
Too lazy to do a new post but the numbers are in and I am thusly relaxed. For now. heh
Estradiol = 279
Progesterone = 46.1
Beta = 326
Look! A chart that shows, for once, that I am normal. Sweet!
{ 71 comments… read them below or add one }
there is no seats for you in the “dread/waiting-for-the-shoe-to-drop” section, babe… the IVP is blocking the entrance… so head on back to the happy hopeful place, mmmkay?
love ya!
gypsy
Sending lots of love to you today hun.
xxxxooooxxxxooooxxxxooooxxxxoooo
Nope, sorry no fog allowed. The weather report is calling for sunny sky high beta numbers. Block out those creepy hands and think of the hundreds of us here who are holding your hand and waiting with you.
Nope, we aren’t having any other shoes here. I’ve decreed it. The Universe doesn’t dare to mess with me.
I am good at the dread too, when it comes to myself. But I’m keeping the faith for you, my friend!
Fingers crossed so tightly over here for you, missy.
I’ll send in Sir Didymus. You know that riding along with a rat terrier is what you need to shake off the fears.
Choose up.
At least this will be a short lived dread, because I’m determined that you will get a sky high beta number and it will be back to the happy shortly. The other shoe will NOT drop this time – I won’t allow it. Well, OK, I don’t have control over anything, but I am hoping and hoping and hoping with all my might for more wonderful news today.
big love and much, much hope and crossed fingers for a high beta number here. sit tight in your happy place!!!! xxxx
I know what you mean. I’m an expert at it myself.
LOOOOOOVE!!!
I love Labyrinth. I literally have the entire movie memorized. That scene never creeped me out, but it’s an excellent analogy for the feeling you have that’s so hard to put in words. That feeling has a lot of power, but repeat to yourself like a mantra Sarah’s final words to Jared, the Goblin King – “You have no power over me.”
I prepare myself in the same way. It’s okay, cali. We all have to handle stress however we need to.
That said, I have a great feeling about today, girlfriend!
There are simply no other shoes to be dropped. None. You’ll have to wait for something else–a rainbow, maybe a unicorn–but no shoes dropping. xoxo
I just can’t help thinking that stork in your yard was there for a reason.
Hang strong!
sweaty palms…unite!!
Right there w/ you…praying we both get awesome news today.
OMG! It (along with The Princess Bride) is one of my favourite movies OF ALL TIME! I started to watch that with D yesterday. He thought the talking hands were so cool & repeated “She said DOWN”. Don’t forget that when she went down they sent her to the oublie-end which translates as the forgotten end. So this blood test will send you to the forgotten or unknown end as opposed to the one that you are already familiar with.
*nodding* But all you can do is hope and pray, right? I think it’s about time all these prayers were answered!
That movie looks terrifying. You are only allowed to think of Bobby McFerrin and the various Cosby Show opening credits sequences.
I am veryy happy for you and will keep only positive thoughts for a happy and healthy 9 months!!!
Nice numbers!
Do you get another beta in a few days?
Yes! So happy!
So happy to hear your great news!
HAPPY DANCE HAS COMMENCED!
Perfect.
Congratulations-those #’s rock!!
Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! ::GRIN::
YES!!!! Beautiful numbers, Cali!
Excellent, simply wonderful!!!
WHOOT WHOOT!!!! Jumping up and down for you my friend!!!
Woohoo!!!!!!!!! Great beta!!!!!!!!! Oh, and mine were 120 and 356, just for the record.
Hooray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now when’s that u/s?
Crossing all my fingers and toes for you!! Hope everything goes well today!!
SCHWEEEEEEEEEEEEET! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!
Great numbers – what’s next?
Holy crap! I missed this! Congrats on HAVING Beta numbers!! I’ll celebrate with you later when they go up. (see.. i’m trying to think positive for ya.
Those numbers are Gorgeous!! Congratulations!
Thinking of you today – hope that the afternoon fax lifts that dread up and tosses it right out.
waaaahoooooooooooooooo!!! this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it !!!
you will never be normal, sweetie… which is why we all love you so!!!
but… it appears you will be a rockin’ pregnant chick!
glad you are relaxed… thanks for the update!
xoxo,
gypsy
i might go play the -number lottery for you tonight…
*326*
Being a genius, I would like to point out that the graph does not say that you are normal. It says that you are high. he he.
I am so happy for your amazing 2nd beta number!
I agree with above posters. No fog in the forecast and no other shoes. Congrats on that nicely rising beta and wishing you many days in the happy sunny place.
Sending much love and congrats on a fabulous second beta from the Twincredible Twosome!! Here’s to many, many days in the sun, Cali!
xoxo
YEAH!!
That is one bad ass beta, lady!
Woohoo!!!!!!!! I’m doing a happy dance here at work for you!
Super Beta Numbers! Congratulations on your pregnancy!
I’m doing a weird happy dance right now.
yeehaw!!!!!!!!!!!
Excellent!
Hurray. It more than doubled, says the math nerd. That’s what we like to see!!!!
Yep — that’s a pregnant woman if I’ve ever seen one! Congrats!
Yay! Wonderful news.
Totally happy for you!!!!! Can’t wait for you to have an ultrasound!! Still sending positive thoughts.
WOW! It just gets better and better! Yay!
Woohoo!!!! That’s what I call a nice beta. So excited for you!
UPDATES should be at the TOP of the page so I don’t hyperventilate scrolling down to find them! Heh. Kidding. YAYAYAYAYAYAYAAAAAAAAY!
I’m in the hospital and can’t access the IVP because of “adult content” – thank goodness you have a blog! Congratulations!!!
I’m comming out of lurkdom to say CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!
wonderful numbers…. you are PREGNANT! I’m so happy for you, may you have a wonderfully happy and healthy pregnancy.
Fantastic Cali!!!
Congrats! When is your u/s?
Normal? Average? Boring? LOVE IT!!!!! Brilliant news honey!
Stay away from the fog Cali!!!
Oh and by the way – those numbers are way above “normal” – Yeeha!!!
That is the most crantastic news I’ve read all morning. And I say crantastic as a nod to your cranberry coloured tartan boots
YOU KICK ASS!
Normal?! More like ABOVE AVERAGE!
Congrats!
PS – nominated you for a blog award
whoohoo!! GREAT NUMBERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (iclw)
lovely numbers sweetie.
those numbers are AWESOME! congrats!!!!!!!!!
::Crossing my fingers for you::